executive functioning - Jamie The Scholar

Energy Accounting Framework

There are so many ways to plan and prioritize our time: by importance, by urgency, by eating the frog. An overlooked dimension is considering how much energy we need for different kinds of tasks and different kinds of environments. It also includes how much recovery time we need afterwards.

For many folks, but particularly neurodiverse folks, they will need to mask or camouflage throughout a typical day and this can be quite draining because it’s a lot of active attention and inhibitory control (or executive functioning); even more so when additional stressors are added through sensory demands, work demands, school commitments, family dynamics, health, and mental well being.

What is Energy Accounting?

Energy accounting, developed by Autistic Clinical Psychologist Maja Toudal, is about figuring out how much energy is needed for a certain task ahead of time and then planning for limiting how much additional energy is being demanded across other parts of the day or week.

It’s about adding recovery sessions when you know you need to expend a lot of energy or mask. It’s more than just getting an early night before an exam or work presentation; it’s also about building in recuperation time as part of your daily/weekly planning!

By gaining insight into the “cost” of particular situations or tasks, you can reduce burnout and dysregulation spirals and feel more empowered about how you plan and prioritize your time.

You can visualize this energy as a battery. Or you could imagine your energy as so many spoons, a framework developed by Christine Miserandino.

When Should We Think About Using Energy Accounting?

This framework is worth exploring when you or your child feel constantly depleted by the demands of daily life. That might look like a packed schedule that leaves no room to breathe, or a season of change that’s asking more than feels manageable right now.

It’s also useful during times of illness, when routines need to shift alongside medical treatment rather than just pushing through.

And if you’re finding yourself dreading commitments you’ve already made, that’s a signal too. Over-scheduling has a cost that doesn’t always show up until it’s already taken a toll.

What Does Burnout or Too Much Masking Look Like?

If you or your child are experiencing burnout, it will often look like some or many of the following symptoms:

Avoidance
Anxiety
Depression
Increased frustration and emotional dysregulation
Difficulty communicating needs
Heightened sensory awareness and overwhelm
Sleep dysregulation

These signs don’t always appear all at once, and they can be easy to dismiss or attribute to something else entirely. If several of these feel familiar, it may be time to take a closer look at what’s being asked of you or your child each day.

Gathering the Data

You know what recharges you and drains you. Awesome! It’s always a good idea to periodically reflect if anything has changed for you over time because what gave you energy in the past might not always stay the same.

1. Start small. Pick an event, activity, or part of your day that you want to capture and take note of your energy level before the event, during the event, and after the event. Just capture it, don’t analyze. Do this at least a few times before reflecting on whether the situation ultimately gives you energy, depletes your energy, or has a neutral effect. You could use a number scale, a mood scale, a color scale, whatever makes sense for you.
2. Make it easy. Keep a pocket-sized notebook on hand or start a digital note, whatever is quicker to access.
3. Keep it short. Don’t overdo the data taking. Limit the timeframe. You’ll get a good sense of things quickly once you begin to practice this skill.
4. Take note. Explicitly write down the situations that boost your energy and which take a lot from you. You can reference this, add to it, and become an expert on accurately predicting what you will need to balance out with recovery techniques.

Recovery Techniques

Knowing what drains you is only half the equation.

The other half is building recovery into your plan before you need it, not after you’re already running on empty.

That means treating rest and recharge time as a non-negotiable part of your schedule, not something you fit in if there’s room left over.

Plan for time to recover after particularly energy-demanding situations or environments. Block it out on your calendar or whatever planning method you use.
Prioritize time without masks or demands. It is not a nice-to-have, but a necessity.

Reflect on what you like and dislike; your true interests, values, sensory profile and identity. You could do this in therapy, through journaling, art, meditation, or in discussion with people you trust.
Use different environments or activities to create a recharge space. It could be calming or energizing, quiet or loud, bright or dim, in solitude or with others, in nature or a busy cafe. Sometimes our nervous system needs sensory input and other times it might need a reduction in sensory input. When our nervous system is regulated, we are optimizing our executive functioning!

Additional Resources

If you want to explore energy accounting further, these are worth bookmarking.

Video: Energy Accounting: Neurodiversity-affirming Approach to Stress and Burnout

Website: Energy Accounting

Working With the Right Support

This post was written by Annabel Furber, Ed.M., founder of Abel Pathways and executive function coach with 20+ years working at the intersection of neuroscience and learning. If energy accounting resonates with you or your student, Annabel offers 1:1 coaching built around how neurodivergent brains actually work, not a one-size-fits-all template. Her first consultation is free, and there’s no pressure, just a real conversation about where you are and where you want to go.

For families with K-12 or college students who need academic support alongside these strategies, Jamie The Scholar works with students the same way: starting with how they actually function, not how they’re supposed to. Our tutors and coaches help students build systems that hold up under real school pressure.

Contact either of us to set up a consultation today and get the help your student needs.

Approaching Exam Week with Intention

What does it mean to go into exam week with intention?

Going into exam week with intention means being purposeful rather than reactive. Rather than cramming or panicking, students:

Know what they are studying for
Have a realistic plan for their time
Spend time taking care of their bodies and minds
Focus on small wins, progress, and not perfection

Preparing with intention helps build confidence. In turn, confidence can improve performance.

1. Start With Clarity, Not Panic

Before studying begins, there are several questions students should have the answers to:

What exams are coming up?
What material will be covered?
What will the exam format look like (multiple choice, short answer, essay, cumulative, etc.)

Action Steps for Families: Sit down together and write out a list of upcoming exams with dates and subjects on a calendar.

Seeing everything on paper can help reduce anxiety, because it clarifies what the week ahead actually holds.

2. Create a Simple, Realistic Study Plan

A good study plan is not about studying all day. It’s about studying effectively, and what’s effective will look different depending on a student’s learning preferences.

Tips by Age Group

Elementary School: Short, focused sessions (15-25 min) reviewing key concepts, reading notes aloud, or using flashcards and games

Middle School: Break subjects into smaller chunks and rotate topics to avoid burnout. Examples of this include spending 25 min on English, taking a five-minute break, and devoting the next 25 min to math.
High School: Prioritize more challenging subjects, schedule longer blocks (30-60 min), and include practice questions from class and active recall activities to promote long-term retention. Practice problems can be found online on websites like Khan Academy, or developed using AI-supported tools. Teachers may also recommend specific learning aids for their courses.

Action step: Plan study time in advance, but do not forget to schedule breaks, meals, and sleep. A balanced schedule promotes retention compared to marathon study sessions.

3. Focus on Active Studying (Not Just Re-Reading Notes)

Effective study strategies for active recall include:

Teaching the material out loud, to a friend, tutor, or parent
Doing practice problems or sample questions (provided by the teacher, found online, etc)
Making summary sheets from memory
Quizzing with flashcards

Action step: At the end of each study session, students should ask themselves, “What can I explain without looking at my notes?”

This can be used to determine gaps. If the answer is unclear, that is where to focus next.

4. Set Intentions, Not Just Goals

Instead of focusing on outcomes (grades), encourage students to set intentions they can control. While this may be understandably challenging, this mindset shift enables students to think more positively about their potential growth/.

Examples:

“If I get a question wrong today, I now have the opportunity to review it so I do not get it wrong on the test.”
“I will give my best effort and read every question carefully.”
“I will use the strategies I practiced for the upcoming exam.”
“I will take my time.”

Action Step: Have students write down one intention the night before each exam, shifting focus from fear to purpose.

5. Keep Perspective

One exam, or even a challenging exam week, does not define a student’s intelligence or future success. It is important that students learn about how to prepare for exams, manage stress, and reflect afterward to improve performance in the future. Encourage students to review exams as feedback, not judgment – a snapshot, not a full picture, that shows there is opportunity for growth.

Going into an exam can be challenging, but by intentionally navigating exams, students can replace stress with structure and fear with confidence. With an outlined study plan, active studying, and healthy routines, students at every grade level can approach exams with greater preparedness.

At Jamie the Scholar, we believe exam success starts BEFORE test day, with thoughtful preparation, strong habits, and encouragement every step of the way.

How Jamie The Scholar Can Help

If exam week is approaching and your student could use a calmer, clearer plan, Jamie The Scholar can help. Our tutors and academic coaches support students in organizing what to study, building a realistic schedule, and using active strategies that strengthen understanding—so they walk into exams feeling prepared instead of panicked.

Whether your child needs help in one subject or wants stronger study habits across the board, we meet them where they are and help them move forward with confidence.

Give us a call to get matched with a tutor or academic coach and set up your first session.

parent and child working together at table

How to Know If Your Child Needs a Tutor (Even If Their Grades Are “Fine”)

If you’re here, you’re probably not panicking, but you’ve noticed a pattern. And that kind of awareness matters.

A lot of families reach out to us not because a student is failing, but because something is starting to chip away at their sense of control. Homework starts taking over evenings. Confidence starts slipping. A student who’s always done “fine” suddenly feels like they’re walking through school with a backpack full of rocks.

Grades don’t always capture that story, but parents notice the shift before it shows up on a report card.

This post isn’t meant to convince you that tutoring is always the answer. It’s meant to help you name what you’re seeing so you can decide, calmly and clearly, what support (if any) would actually help.

Here are a few signs worth paying attention to.

Homework gets done, but it takes too much out of them

A lot of students can keep their grades up while quietly struggling at home. The work gets finished, but it feels like it takes the whole evening and the whole mood with it.

If you’re finding that homework time has become heavier lately, that’s worth paying attention to.

A few common signs:

Assignments take much longer than they should
Your child stalls, circles, or shuts down before starting
You’re repeating the directions, and it still doesn’t click
The tone at home shifts as soon as homework comes up

This usually isn’t about effort. It’s about what’s getting in the way. Sometimes they missed a key step earlier in the year. Sometimes they don’t know how to begin. Sometimes the issue is staying organized and focused long enough to finish.

Example conversation:
“I’m not upset about homework. I want it to feel easier. What part feels hardest: starting, staying focused, or understanding what the work is asking?”

They understand the lesson, until they have to do it alone

This is one of the most common “invisible” struggles we see, and it can be confusing because it looks like everything is fine during the school day.

A student can follow along in class, participate, and genuinely understand what the teacher is doing. Then they get home, open the assignment, and suddenly feel stuck before they even start. You might hear things like:

“We didn’t learn this.”
“I don’t know where to start.”
“I studied, but I still did badly.”

Most of the time, that isn’t a motivation issue. It’s a transfer issue. They understood the example while someone else was guiding the steps, but they don’t yet have a repeatable way to do it independently.

That’s where tutoring can be especially helpful. The goal isn’t to pile on more explanations. It’s to build a process a student can reuse, like how to begin, how to check their work, and what to do when they’re unsure.

Try asking:
“Before we worry about the whole problem, what do you think step one is?”

Confidence is changing, even if performance looks the same.

Sometimes the grades still look fine, but your child’s relationship with school starts to change.

You might notice more stalling, more avoiding, more “I’ll do it later,” or a quicker shutdown when something feels hard. It can look like attitude on the surface, but often it’s something quieter: discouragement. When a student feels stuck often enough, they start protecting themselves by pulling away.

A few ways this shows up:

They avoid certain subjects or assignments, even ones they used to handle
Small setbacks feel huge
They rush through work just to be done, then feel worse when the results don’t match their effort

What helps most here is not pressure. It’s a small return to control. Students regain momentum when they can see the next step, take it, and feel a win they actually believe.

Try asking:
“Where did it start to feel confusing or frustrating for you?”

That question matters because it turns “I hate this” into something we can work with. Once you find the exact point where they get stuck, the solution usually becomes much clearer.

And this is also where support can make a real difference. Not because your child needs someone to push them, but because having a steady person beside them can help them rebuild the habit of moving forward when things get hard.

They’re doing well, but school is costing them too much

This one can be easy to miss because, on paper, everything looks fine.

Some students keep their grades up while quietly paying for it in other ways. They stay up late rechecking work. They take forever to finish assignments because it never feels “done.” They study even when they’re prepared, because they don’t feel prepared. And over time, school starts to crowd out sleep, downtime, and the parts of life that make a student feel like themselves.

You might notice things like:

They redo work repeatedly, even when it’s already strong
They panic before tests despite studying
They can’t relax after finishing something because it “might not be good enough”
A small mistake ruins their whole mood

In this situation, tutoring isn’t about raising grades. It’s about helping a strong student build a cleaner process, trust their preparation, and work more efficiently so they don’t burn all their energy just trying to stay afloat.

Try asking:
“When you’re working, what part feels the most stressful for you—starting, getting it ‘right,’ or knowing when you’re done?”

That question usually opens the real conversation. Because once you know what’s driving the stress, you can respond with something more useful than “just try harder.”

Teachers say: “They’re capable, but . . .”

This is one of those phrases that can stick with a parent, because it’s both reassuring and unsettling at the same time. It means your child has the ability. It also means something is getting in the way of consistency.

Teachers might describe it like this:

“They rush.”
“They’re inconsistent.”
“They don’t turn things in.”
“Their work doesn’t match what they know.”

When you hear this, it often isn’t a content problem. It’s usually a skills problem under the academics: planning, starting, keeping track of deadlines, studying effectively, and following through.

This is where academic coaching can matter just as much as subject tutoring. Once the system improves, the schoolwork often feels less overwhelming.

Try asking:
“When work doesn’t get done, what part breaks first: keeping track of it, getting started, or sticking with it until it’s finished?”

What tutoring is, and what it isn’t

Tutoring done well is not someone doing the work for your child. It’s not a permanent crutch. And it’s not something you should only consider when things fall apart.

At its best, tutoring teaches students how to approach work, build habits that stick, and become more independent. The goal is always the same: over time, students need less help, not more.

What tutoring often looks like in the first month

A good start usually feels practical, not dramatic.

In the first few sessions, we figure out what’s actually causing the struggle. Then we build a plan the student can follow and practice with real assignments. Over time, the student starts to internalize the process.

Families often notice a few early wins:

homework becomes more predictable,
the student gets “unstuck” faster,
and the emotional weight of school starts to ease.
less family arguments around school and homework

A quick gut-check

If you’re unsure, these questions tend to clarify things:

Is homework taking longer than it reasonably should?
Can your child do the work with help, but not independently?
Has stress or avoidance increased this year?
Do you feel like you’re carrying too much of the academic load at home?

If several of these feel true, extra support may be worth considering.

Not ready to call yet? Try a 10-minute check-in tonight

Ask four questions:

What felt hardest this week?
What felt easiest?
What’s one thing you’re worried about?
What’s one change that could make next week smoother?

You’re not trying to solve everything in ten minutes. You’re listening for the pattern.

How Jamie The Scholar can help

At Jamie The Scholar, we match students with tutors who fit their learning style and goals, and we support both 1:1 tutoring for skill-building and academic coaching for organization, routines, and confidence.

If you’re unsure what kind of support your student needs, that’s normal. We can help you sort it out quickly and build a plan that actually fits.

Call us at 1-888-577-3224 to schedule a free consultation.

Learning Through Struggle: Lessons from The Self-Driven Child

At Jamie The Scholar, we’re proud to share this guest post from Eric Gil, CEO of Strong Branch Learning, an academic coaching agency dedicated to helping students build independence and resilience.

Eric believes that The Self-Driven Child is a valuable resource that parents can turn to, offering practical wisdom for raising confident, independent learners.

Why This Book Matters for Parents

What I appreciated most about The Self-Driven Child is its coaching advice for both adults and children. So eager to protect those we love from pain, we sometimes rob them of the opportunity to learn life’s most impactful lessons. In trying to guarantee “ideal” outcomes, we take on responsibilities our kids are capable of handling themselves.

The “Self-Driven Child” reminds us that growth comes when children are allowed to face the natural consequences of their actions. I’ve learned to admire parents who are willing to let their children experience those consequences, even when it’s difficult to watch.

Whether that means turning in an unfinished project, missing out on an activity, or even repeating a grade, these moments teach accountability in ways that parental “rescue” never can.

By allowing consequences to stand, parents send a powerful message: your choices matter, and you are capable of learning from them. That shift in responsibility not only fosters independence, it also builds the resilience kids need to thrive later in life.

Ownership and Effort Go Hand in Hand

One of the book’s most powerful lessons is that when adults take over the effort, children step back and release ownership. Over time, this pattern quietly undermines their confidence and motivation.

That’s why so many “homework wars” are not really about algebra problems at all. They are battling over who owns the work. When parents fight to control the process, students push back because the responsibility is no longer theirs to carry.

This is where perspective becomes crucial. As adults, we may think we’re helping by smoothing the path, but in reality, we’re taking away the very opportunity for growth. When children tackle something “the hard way,” they form memories with strong emotional weight. Those memories become anchors of motivation that fuel effort the next time they face a challenge.

Why Mistakes Matter

The truth is simple. Mistakes are not setbacks; they are lessons. The younger children are, the easier it is for them to recover, and the more time they have to carry the wisdom forward.

Shielding them from consequences may feel protective in the moment, but it only delays the learning they will eventually need to acquire.

The very conflicts we try to avoid—unfinished homework, forgotten responsibilities, difficult grades—are the same experiences that build resilience, accountability, and motivation.

When we let children face these struggles, we are not abandoning them. We are equipping them with the strength to grow.

How Jamie The Scholar and Strong Branch Learning Can Help Your Student Succeed

This is why I believe The Self-Driven Child is a book worth every parent’s attention. It reflects the same principles we live by at Strong Branch Learning and the same values that Jamie The Scholar holds: that growth doesn’t come from perfection, but from the willingness to try, fail, and try again.

Together, we can help children become self-driven learners, prepared for both academic success and life’s challenges.

Want to help your child build resilience and confidence in learning? Call us today at 888-577-3224 to learn more about how we can support your family.